We're one and we're twain, now let's play a game!
by TamaraHefner
Summary: Paul and Peter intrude yet another house, expecting to be able to play their usual funny games. What they didn't expect is that one of their hostages is just as sick as they are, and she's really excited to play along... Paul x OC


AN: A different take on the whole Funny Games story. I wanted to write something where one completely selfish character with a strong will to survive, no matter the consequences gets into a game of the boys and plays along without hesitating and without caring for the other characters.

**Disclaimer: I don't own Funny Games or any of it's characters. I do own my OC's, Mary, Helen and Sally, though.**

"This is going to be so much _fun_!", Helen exclaimed. Mary looked at her and studied her features, like she always did. It was a habit she has had since she was a child. People would tell her that it's rude to stare, but Mary just found it way too interesting to find clues on their private life just by looking at their outer appearance.

_Helen was pretty, as always, even though she constantly had too much make up on. In combination with her trampy clothes she looked a little bit too slutty. She was tall, blonde and had blue eyes. She could be a model, if it weren't for that badly covered, bulged bruise on her left cheek, which was probably caused by her fathers' violence again_

"Heck yes, I love sleepovers! What movie do you two wanna watch?"

That remark came from Sally, and Mary's gaze moved automatically over to her, observing and analyzing her appearance as well.

_Sally had her dark blonde hair in a messy bun. She wasn't that kind of girl you'd turn around for if you saw her walking down the street, even though she had her curves in all the right places and pouty lips that even Brigitte Bardot would have envied. Her eyes were grey and she constantly looked tired because she didn't wear make up at all. The cheap clothes she wore were an ever present proof of her mother's struggle for money._

"Mary, are you here with us?", Sally laughed. Mary looked Sally straight in the eyes and started mirroring her laugh.

"Stop it, I hate it when you do that. It's weird.", Helen intervened.

"Do what?", Mary replied with an over-the-top faked confused expression on her face. She loved making fun of people.

"The mocking. Stop mocking Sally and me all the time.", the blonde said, looking away.

"Sorry." Mary changed her expression immediately, pretending to care.

"Come on you two, be nice to each other!"

That was Sally speaking again, with the usual big smile on her face.

Mary asked herself why she had even agreed on this dumb sleepover. She hated Helen and she found Sally utterly annoying. But her mother was worried about the fact that Mary didn't have any close friends, so that was a good opportunity to soothe her worries.

Mary's thoughts were interrupted by the ringing doorbell.

Sally groaned and said: "I don't wanna get up, I'm so comfortable right now!"

"Ugh, I'm not going either.", said Helen.

'Lazy bitches', Mary thought as she stood up. Then she turned around and said in a menacing voice: "If it's a serial killer, I'll let him in."

Helen and Sally pretended to be really scared and then started laughing.

After going downstairs, Mary got distracted by her own appearance in the big hallway mirror. People would think that she was vain and maybe they were somewhat right, but it was mostly just that part of her that analyzed everyone, even her own reflection.

_She was a small girl with an innocent face. Her eyes were big and had a dark green color. She had brown, mid-length hair and wore a dress that was a little bit too revealing. The whole time she would catch herself pulling it down and fidgeting with it. It was clear that she wasn't feeling comfortable in this thing. But that was about the only visible clue on her personality. Good, she thought to herself._

When she saw her own face in the mirror, she immediately changed her resting bitchface to a happy and welcoming smile. There were people at the door, after all.

Keeping her expression in place she stepped to the door and opened it, revealing two good looking young men, who seemed to be a little older than herself. She automatically looked at the taller, more attractive one first.

_He had honey blonde, neatly combed hair and seemed to be very athlethic. His friendly smile didn't reach his eyes, but he was still very handsome. The only weird thing about him was that he was all dressed in white and he wore... gloves? It was really hot outside, why did he wear those? His facade is definetely too clean, there has to be some dirt underneath._

Her gaze wandered to the other one.

_His hair was a little bit darker and curlier. He was a little heavier and also shorter than the other guy, but he had the same friendly smile on his face that didn't look real. He wore a white shirt, dark shorts and also gloves. Odd. Definetely too clean._

Mary looked at the gloves again. Gloves... During summer? And since Mary never bothered with being polite, she only shortly introduced herself, extended her hand and asked: "What's with the gloves?"

"Nice to meet you, Mary. I'm Peter, this is Paul. We... uhm...", she seemed to have caught him off guard because he struggled to give her an answer.

"We are both having trouble with eczemas, you know.", Paul quickly answered.

"Are you brothers?", she asked, a spark of curiosity growing inside her head.

"No, we're not, but we look alike, don't we?", explained the guy who had introduced himself as Peter.

"Yes, you do.", she said, keeping her 'welcome, strangers' facade plastered on her face. "And what do you want?"

"Don't you want to know who we are?", Peter asked.

"You're Peter and that's Paul. You're not brothers. What else should I know?" Mary never bothered with knowing things about the neighbours or who was friends with whom. She just didn't care.

The taller one, Paul, started explaining: "Well, we are staying at the Blair's house for the weekend and Mrs Blair ran out of eggs and-"

Mary interrupted him. "So you need eggs. How many?"

Paul's expression immediately changed. "You're being impolite, Mary. You shouldn't interrupt people while they are talking."

"But I don't care who you're staying with, so if you want eggs, you should stop babbling and tell me how many you need.", Mary snapped.

She saw something that looked like anger flickering up in Paul's eyes. He was just about to say something when Peter said: "Four would be fine."

"Four then. Stay where you are, I'll be right back.", she smiled and headed for the kitchen.

The eggs, as well as the whole rest of the house, belonged to Sally's family, who were, except for Sally, all out of the house, so Mary figured it would be okay to give four eggs away. After a minute of searching she had found four eggs in the fridge and brought them to the young men, who had blatantly walked into the hallway and were now looking around the house.

"Excuse you, but I think I asked you to wait outside.", Mary said, dropping her nice facade and glaring at them with her 'normal' face.

"We thought it wouldn't be a problem.", Peter stated.

"Well you thought wrong. Here are your eggs. Now leave."

Mary definetely had no time for games, no matter how good looking Paul was and wanted to give one of them the eggs, but neither of them took them.

Paul hooted: "You're being so incredibly _rude_, Mary! I think your parents should have taught you some manners. Where are they, by the way?"

"They're not here. This isn't my house. I'm here with two other people, Sally and Helen.", Mary said without thinking twice.

Peter looked at Paul with a face Mary couldn't quite classify and Paul nodded in agreement. Then he closed the door and both of them took a few more steps into the house.

Mary shook her head. "No, I said get _out_, not get _in_! How dumb are you two?"

In that moment, Paul smacked his hand across Mary's face and she fell to the floor, along with the eggs she still held in her hand. "You don't call other people dumb, do you hear me? That is very impolite."

While she was on the floor, Mary thought and thought and then it clicked. The gloves. The odd behaviour. The question, whether her parents were there or not. This situation reminded her of many cases she had read about in the newspaper. The culprits tricked their way into the house of their chosen victims and took anyone in the chosen household hostage and tortured them for multiple hours, just to murder them. It had to be these guys, she could feel it. But she needed proof, so she decided to push them further.

"It's not impolite if it's the truth.", Mary said defiantly, while looking directly at Paul. She could have sworn that she had seen his eyes light up in amusement as she said that.

Upstairs, Helen and Sally opened the door, probably to check what the noise was about, and proceeded to walk down the stairs when they saw her laying on the floor next to the cracked eggs, and the two tall young men. Both girls looked confused.

"Mary? What happened? And who are you two?", Sally's voice went all the way from concerned to angry.

"I'm Paul, this is Peter and your friend insulted both of us, I got angry and slapped her, I apologize for that. I overreacted. No need to shout at us."

Mary got up in the meantime and readjusted her dress, noticing how Paul looked at her revealed areas.

Look all you want, handsome, I've got no problem with it, she thought to herself. Suddenly, an idea popped into her head. She had always had a thing for psychopaths, she couldn't explain why, and this one was very handsome.

Why not test whether or not she could survive in a situation like that?

Maybe she could and have her fun too. Sure, it was a risk, but she was bored. And this seemed like fun.

They wanted to play the polite creeps? She could play along.

"I suppose I was indeed very rude. I accept your apology and apologize too. Why don't you stay and join us?", Mary purred with the sweetest smile she could fake, fixing Paul's eyes with hers.

As a reaction to what she said, both men smiled. Paul said, almost in a proud tone: "Look, she can be polite! How wonderful! We accept your offer, of course."

"Wow, how nice of you, Mary! And I already thought you were going to act like a bitch the whole time! Sorry for the word.", Peter said sheepishly.

"Mary, what the fuck? Why are you inviting these strangers in? What's going on?", Helen stuttered. Her face had probably become all red, but that was not visible because of her make up. She also had started crying. This girl was so emotionally cracked, Mary thought. Just like the eggs.

Peter walked over to her, trying to calm her down. "Hey, nothing will happen to you, if you just do as we say!" As he extended her hand, probably to wipe the tears off her bruised cheek, Helen stumbled backwards.

Mary wanted to push the limits, she wanted to know if it was the guys from the newspaper or not. Maybe they would reveal something unwillingly.

She looked straight at Peter and stated: "That sounds like something that a psycho killer would say."

It was completely silent until Paul started laughing. "Isn't she funny? I like her, even though she was rude in the first place! This will be a good game, right Tubby?"

"Stop calling me that! You know I have weight issues!", Peter raged.

"Ohh, don't argue, you two. Shall I show you where the living room is? This way.", Mary coaxed, leading them to Sally's living room with the large sofa.

Mary sat down and Sally sat herself down right next to her, so she could whisper in her ear: "What the fuck do you think you're doing, Mary?"

Mary looked at her with a cold expression and said, louder than necessary: "It's rude to whisper when you have guests, Sally."

Sally stared at her with a disbelievingly expression and Mary just smiled and turned her attention towards Paul again. Yes, this would be fun.


End file.
